Oh goodness...Trainerward at your service. I think he could TOTALLY get me to go to the gym once in a while. Yum. :D
Mrs. White: Hey Lalina! Wow, this gym is a lot more crowded than I thought.
Lalina: Mmmm nice eye candy tho! Good call ;)
MW: Hey, Hottie Neighbor Guy said his friends all work out here. He had a swimming party...this gym works.
Lalina: Think they'll catch on if we just stand here staring?
MW: Wait, what? I was distracted by that guy in the corner lifting weights. Um, let's grab these treadmills and I think we'll be good.
Lalina: **looks at treadmill thingamabobbies** How the hell does this thing work?
MW: Beats me. I think we just jump on and it goes.
Lalina: I don't think that's the way it works... where the fuck is Trainerward when you need him? **pushes buttons at random**
MW: Oh, good idea! Let's see if they have a Trainerward here that we can lure over. So, in the meantime, how did you get started in fan fic?
Lalina: I was on a mom’s board and frequenting a thread that was created for Twilight junkies when another mom posted the link to a story on fanfiction.net. I started fic diving but couldn’t find any really good Isle Esme missing scenes so I decided to write my own. :)) The rest is history!
MW: Wow, sounds interesting. I think I'm gonna go with the button that says "Slower than a snail's stroll." I hope that's not too fast.
Lalina: Yeah really, I didn't get a butt like this from walking around fast, tell you that much!
MW: Yeah, the only time I get a burst of energy is when they have a sale at the lingerie store. Or the sex toy shop.
Lalina: Heh... Ok, I think I finally got this thing working. **ogles the guy on the leg spreader**
MW: Oh nice! Man, you look good in that out fit. **adjusts her sports bra** Yeah, so what's the first story you read?
Lalina: Aww this ole thing? **giggles** This is horrible, but I honestly can’t remember the name! It was about Bella and Edward going to a party and that’s pretty much all I remember! heh
MW: Hmmmm, I like parties. And I don't mean Tupperware parties. And that's an old outfit? I had to buy something special for today.
Lalina: Did you visit Alice? ;)
MW: I should have! Nah, I got some retired hooker that only wanted to show me tube tops and micro mini's. Oh, and 6 inch heels.
Lalina: Well you certainly know how to work it girl!
MW: Yes, well, lot's of practice. What can I say? Oh and how many pairs of shoes do you have? You can borrow a few of the hooker heels I bought...
Lalina: Erm… too many according to hubs :)) They have to have that really thick platform though, and clear plastic only
MW: Oh heck yes! When I go whore, I go all the way!
Lalina: Awesome!
MW: Yeah, so what's your favorite fan fic story?
Lalina: Irritable Grizzly Adams by Caligula42 . It’s just a beautifully written story. Her imagery is sublime, and she writes gorgeous prose. Also, the fact that it’s still in my alerts even though she doesn’t get a chance to update often is a pretty good indicator of love! :))
MW: Hmmm, I haven't read that one. It's good huh?
Lalina: Love it
MW: I'll have to try it one of these days.
Lalina: I just wish she didn't have a life so I could get updates all the time. **sigh**
MW: Oh I know, real life is always getting in the way. My kids want dinner, or they need a ride to school. Such a pain.
Lalina: Same here! Right now I'm being summoned to tuck mine into bed!
MW: K **whistles while scanning the room for hot guys to ogle**
Lalina: Back now!
MW: Nice. Those kids got you on a pager or something?
Lalina: Feels like it sometimes....
MW: Yeah. Hey, do you know how to french braid hair?
Lalina:Yes… not very good, mind you!
MW: What about fishtailing?
Lalina: And no, I’m not even sure what a fishtail is… I googled it, I don't know if I'd be very good :D
MW: Trust me honey, it's pretty simple. OH! Leg cramp! Leg cramp!!
Lalina: **massages Mrs. White’s leg** Ooh... ooohhhh... nice lambchop hunny!
MW: You're so good. You have, like, magic fingers. Nice. **winks at Lalina* * So, how did you come up with the idea for your stories?
Lalina: Which one? laughs Ok, short versions…
A Great Disturbance – While reading Eclipse I was convinced Bree would be adopted by the Cullens and it would create a love square. I never did lose that idea so I wrote it out. It um, took a pretty dark turn though!
Love Net – I don’t quite remember. It was my first foray into AH and the idea came to me out of nowhere.
The Sacrificial Lamb – I had a dream of the opening chapter, when Aro offers Bella to Edward. When I woke up, I started thinking of reasons why they’d be in an abandoned warehouse and who they were and the rest of the story sort of spun out from there.
Let’s Get Physical – I blame GLEE! After the episode with Olivia Newton John I had the song Let’s Get Physical stuck in my head for WEEKS. It was awful! And then one day as I was singing, I remembered her video and the idea for an overweight Bella and personal trainer Edward came to me.
MW: Interesting. You know, people kept telling me about your first stories and how wonderful they are.
Lalina: Thank you :D
MW: Yeah, keep them fingers going there, babe. So, how does it make you feel when people gush over you and your stories?
Lalina: Umm… weird! LOL… I love it when someone tells me they enjoy my stories, that’s good enough for me, I don’t need gushing. :)) Let’s save the gushing for Bella’s girly bits! Heh… Really, I’m just a chick who happens to write stuff. Nothing special, really, so it still really surprises me when someone goes fangirly on me.
MW: Oh, I think a few people out there in the fandom wouldn't agree with that. They think you're pretty special.
Lalina: I don't know... I don't do diva. **hee-hee** I'd rather just joke around and have fun with my readers. How's that feel? Better?
MW: **hhhmmmmm** That feels pretty great. If you're not careful, I'm gonna get fake leg cramps every time I see you. And that’s sweet about your readers. Speaking of sweet, you want a candy bar? I think I saw a vending machine on the way in here. Yeah, I'm sure there was a Snickers in there somewhere. I think I saw donuts too.
Lalina: Donuts in a vending machine? Blech. I'm an elitest snacker
MW: Well, you know, those little Hostess ones. The tiny ones with chocolate or powdered sugar on them. They SAY you should eat each one in 2 or 3 bites, but I can stuff a whole one in my mouth.
Lalina: Ahhh... yeah, that's more a hubs snack. I go for the big guns.
MW: Hmmm, a woman after my own heart. Say, you think lifting a flask to my mouth 50 times a day counts as weight lifting?
Lalina: Depends on how much is in the flask. **nods**
MW: Well, it starts out full...
Lalina: Maybe you should do less reps, more weights :D Liquid weight, that is.
MW: Maybe. Not a bad idea, I gotta say. So, who is your favorite character to write?
Lalina: It’s different every story but I seem to be partial to Edward. It’s interesting to me to try and write a male POV and he’s usually such a character!
MW: Hmmmm, I'm partial to Edward too...
Lalina: I love my Wards... **sigh**
MW: Yeah, I need something to wash this down. What's your favorite drink?
Lalina: Iced Tea for non-alcoholic or Frozen Margaritas for alcoholic.
MW: We are SO hitting the bar on the way home. These outfits will really attract us some attention.
Lalina: I'm in! ;)
MW: Yeah, I think that Olivia Newton John headband of yours will really turn some heads.
Lalina: Maybe I can get the DJ to play Let's Get Physical?
MW: Oh yeah! Hey, I wonder if they play music in here? **looks at everyone with their ipods** Let's ask the cute guy behind the desk.
Lalina: You go on ahead, he's checking out your hookah shewz.
MW: Yeah, and why wouldn't he? They are slut-tastic! Oh, I was gonna ask you how you got your beta?
Lalina: My Beta is Beowulfgirl :)) She was an avid reader of TSL. Originally, I wasn’t betaing my chapters on FFN with the plan to have them betad later to replace the originals (I was terribly impatient and didn’t want to wait for edits before posting!) Beowulfgirl approached me to see if I needed a beta because of this. We got to talking, and I put her through stringent tests which she passed! Heh… Basically, I needed someone who could get edited chapters back to me relatively quickly, and she’s awesome like that. She also strikes a great balance between constructive criticism and blowing sunshine up my butt. A hard thing to find, let me tell you!
MW: You know, that is a hard thing to find. You hold on to that girl!
Lalina: You betcha, she rocks my world.
MW: Ohhhh... HEY! Which Disney Princess most closely resembles you and why?
Lalina: I suppose Belle from Beauty and the Beast. Mostly because she has the brown hair and eyes, she’s lippy and stands up for what she wants and she’s a daddy’s girl. Also cause my hubs can be kind of beastly!
MW: Beastly, huh? Does he have any brothers? **flinches at Lalina’s raised eyebrow** Don't look at me like that.
Lalina: 5 actually. ;)
MW: Score!
Lalina: Pretty sure 3 of them are single.
MW: Nice. I'm SO on that. So, I meant to ask you, Which Twilight saga book is your favorite? And what’s your opinion on Breaking Dawn?
Lalina: Twilight is my favorite. I didn’t mind BD, but I read all 4 books in a row (devoured them in less than a week would be a better description!) so I didn’t have the anticipation of waiting. I also like Jacob so I didn’t mind getting his POV in the story even if it was inconsistent with the other 3. What I DIDN’T like was making Jacob into pretty much a pedophile. That squicked me right the heck out. I would have rather he just found some regular girl to imprint on. It felt too contrived. The last book was also so busy in comparison the first 3, and I was disappointed that the big battle turned in to the fight that never was. It wasn’t my favorite but it wasn’t my least liked of the 4, either.
MW: Yep, me too. Though I'm okay with the imprinting thing. It makes me feel not so guilty for wanting RPattz.
Lalina: Ick.... No, baby loving Jacob was a deal breaker for me. I don't care if SM did try and prepare us with the Quil/Claire pairing. I hated it.
MW: Yeah, I know you're not the only one. So, if you could get it on with any character from one of your stories, who would it be and why?
Lalina: Just ONE?? Crap… I love all my Wards! ahaa
MW: Oh heck yes! How about we try those bike machine things? They doesn't look too stressful. Plus did you see the guy working out in front of those?
Lalina: No, I missed him. Okay! Biking it is :D
MW: I'll take the one with the streamers on the handle bars.
Lalina: Damnit! This one's even got buttons TOO!
MW: **hee-hee** Let's just start pushing them and see what happens?
Lalina: Ummmm, I don't think you push these kind.
MW: Oh no. Mine has a little dial thingie. It's got all these numbers, 5, 10, 15, 20... What do you think that means?
Lalina: You're asking me??
MW: Right, nevermind. **hee-hee** So, If you could give one piece of advice to a new author, what would it be?
Lalina: Don’t let the reviews rule you. I fell into this trap as well when I first started writing fanfic, wondering what I was doing wrong and why other stories seemed to reel in the reviews while mine didn’t. The number of reviews you get is NOT indicative of how good your writing is.
MW: That's right, you tell it sista!
Lalina: It's tough when you start out. There's no magic formula... Some people get lucky on their first shot and others need a few stories under their belts first.
MW: So true. Did you see the way that guy bends? I'll bet he could bend me...
Lalina: Nice tushy.
MW: Mhmm... And those arms are not too shabby either.
Lalina: I'm a sucker for nice arms... mm mm mmm
MW: Yeah...I like shoulders. Oh, hey, Who is your celebrity crush?
Lalina: Again, only ONE?? lol… I suppose Milo Ventimiglia is at the top of that list. Something about that guy just makes me go humina humina!
MW: Yeah, he is pretty. He did a video with Fergie, right?
Lalina: OH! And Channing Tatum too. Yes, that's Milo. **sigh** LOVE HIM!!
MW: **hangs head in shame** I didn't even know who Channing was until I saw Dear John. He's totally on my man meat radar now.
Lalina: He was the dancer in Step It Up :D <--- Aging myself.
MW: Oh honey, you're not any older than me, but yeah...I didn't see that one either.
Lalina: Channing is my Mobward actually.
MW: Ohhh, I can totally see that! What is the last movie you saw in a theater?
Lalina: Need you ask? Eclipse! **heh**
MW: Yeah, me too, except my kids dragged me to see that Toy Story 3 movie. Darned cartoons that make me cry...
Lalina: Awww.... cartoons these days are horrible. I bawled for the first hour of UP. **sheesh** MW: **whistles uncomfortably while trying to get her feet to stay on the pedal thingies** I never saw that one either.
Lalina: If you feel like crying, you should! LOL
MW: Okay, I'll raid the kids dvd stash.
Lalina: Which is pretty sad considering it's a kid's cartoon!
MW: Wow, it's a good thing I like angst so much. So, What is your favorite part about fan fic and the Twilight fandom?
Lalina: The friends we make. It’s such a huge community so to find like-minded people is a pleasure.
MW: Oh yeah!! I talk to my online friends more than my real life friends. That's not sad or pitiful, right?
Lalina: Not at all :D
MW: Okay good, as long as you say so. Hey, they are playing Biggest Loser on the tv's in here. Would you ever go on a reality show?
Lalina: The Biggest Loser? LOL… Honestly, I don’t really watch reality TV so I’m the wrong person to ask.
MW: Yeah, do they even make sitcoms anymore?
Lalina: Who knows! The only TV show I watch these days is Dexter. I'm generally doing something fanfic-y in the evenings.
MW: Yeah, me too. Except I watch Glee and Big Bang Theory. I love me the musicals and nerds.
Lalina: **pokes Mrs. White** New guy... ten o'clock!
MW: Oh wow!
Lalina: Love both those shows but once I get in a writing groove you just can't pull me out of it. :)
MW: Here, help me adjust my daisy dukes, I wanna flash a little more butt cheek as he walks by.
Lalina: **yanks Mrs. White’s shorts up higher**
MW: Nice. I think he noticed...
Lalina: Kinda hard not to! **smacks yer ass**
MW: **hee-hee** So, what is your favorite ALMOST curse word?
Lalina: Crap. I use it all the time! LOL
MW: NO WAY! Mine too!! It's crap-tastic!!
Lalina: LOL I like Crap-tacular myself
MW: Hmmm, yeah, that's nice too. :D
Lalina: It has a great ring to it! Like, did you read that craptacular fic?
MW: Heck yes it does! Hey, how about rapid fire questions? You game?
Lalina: Shoot. **heh-heh** Get it? Shoot? LOL
MW: **hee-hee** You're so snarky.
Lalina: **snark snark**
MW: If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Lalina: Right now, Australia so I could visit my crazy Aussie friends. (even though they live on opposite sides of the damned country!)
MW: Do you listen to music while you write? Does music inspire your stories in any way?
Lalina: I do. Certain songs come to me as I write chapters, they don’t inspire the chapter itself but I think “Oh! Such and such song would really fit here.”
MW: What’s your favorite tv show from when you were a child?
Lalina: This is horrible… I can’t think of any! We didn’t watch much TV as kids.
MW: What’s your favorite item on a relish/vegetable tray?
Lalina: You and your ‘favorite’ questions…and always to things where I have more than one favorite! Carrots
MW: How did you choose your pen name/username?
Lalina: It’s a name I’ve used in other forums. I never expected to be a writer of fanficiton, it just kind of happened. Perhaps I would have been more imaginative if I’d known! :))
MW: Um, I think I broke this bike thing. That blonde girl at the desk is looking at us weird. Do you think that's bad?
Lalina: As long as it doesn't start smoking, we're good!
MW: Cool. Dang, that hot guy is going into the yoga room. You think we should follow him?
Lalina: Yoga? I dunno... you need to be flexible for that stuff. <-- so not flexible.
MW: Oh, I'm flexible baby. I'll help you out. Or maybe we can get one of those cute trainers to join us...
Lalina: Ok, you go be bendy, I'll lie on the floor and imitate a speed bump. :D
MW: Yeah, I'm very bendy. **hee-hee** Alright, one more question before I go get my bend on. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
Lalina: I’d like him to direct me to wherever my father may be so I could give him a hug and tell him how much I missed him all of these years.
MW: Ohhhh...that's so sweet.
Lalina: **sad smile**
MW: Let's see if I can cheer you up a bit. Looks like a new trainer just came on shift, and he's a red head. I'm thinking you need a good rub down, what do you say?
Lalina: I say Let's DO it!
MW: Yes!!
Lalina: Come on, bb... Trainerward awaits ;)
**********
I do love it when Mrs. White talks to authors I like... :)
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