Mrs. White Gets Super Saved by LaViePastiche

So, after much begging, pleading, and barbequed chicken, I bring you Mrs. White's extended interview with LaViePastiche, author of Son of a Preacher Man.

This chicken is really good...

Mrs. White: Hey LaViePastiche! Welcome to Arizona! You like the heat? LaViePastiche: I’m likin’ the heat, girl! I just need to learn to apply more than SPF4…
MW: You should feel right at home here since your story takes place in the Valley of the Sun.
LVP: Well, over the last year, it’s certainly begun to feel more like home… I’ve grown rather attached to the place.

MW: So, how did you get started in fan fic?
LVP: I had some ideas after I read the series (in like a week and a half) and so I decided to see if there were any sites where people wrote fanfic. (I knew of the concept but I'd never actually been involved in any other fandom) I discovered FF and the plethora of Twific in Jan 09, and read some while I waited for my acct. to validate so I could start writing/posting.

MW: Fun. Sorry about all that noise next door. My neighbor guy is having a barbeque tonight, though we might find some Jasper’s or Edward’s there. He’s got some hot friends. What do you like to barbeque?
LVP: Steak. I love me some red meat. Sausage is pretty good too. God, I just love meat.

MW: Well honey, there’s plenty of meat over there. We can watch from the window. Now, what’s the first story you read?
LVP: Hmm...no idea. It probably wasn't very good. I read a lot of subpar stuff before I stumbled on to the better stories. I did read Let Your Light Shine by Lolashoes very early on when it was first being posted, and I really enjoyed that one.

MW: Yeah, subpar is never fun. I know. What’s the last movie you saw in a theater?
LVP: Hmmm... The Fantastic Mr. Fox, I think.

MW: Ooo-kay. What’s your favorite fan fic story and why?
LVP: I have a few for different reasons.
- Scotch, Gin and the New Girl by jandco and wtvoc, for obvious reasons - Jaspery goodness and it was just lots of fun, like a good teen movie. I also love everything I've read by jandco, but particularly Mutually Assured Destruction.
-Cascade and Cyanide by Americnxidiot was another one that really captivated me when I read it. I like really angsty, serious stuff, but with some kind of hopeful ending - so all the fics I read bear some similarities, I guess.

MW: Oh, those are amazing stories! I named a cookie after Smooth Jasper in SGatNG. They are almost as yummy as Jasper is…
LVP: Hmmm, I’d like a taste of him…I mean those. Never mind, back to the subject.
-Oh and I can't forget A Murmur of Fire in the Vein by ElleCC - because it's about my husband. (Alison is going to fire me for saying that...)!

MW: Husbands…I don’t have to worry about that anymore. Oh hey, do you own any animal print clothing?
LVP: Yeah I have some zebra/tiger stuff. I don't love animal print but I wear some accent stuff sometimes just for fun. I do have some zebra print pants that are pretty hot.

MW: Ohhh, sexy. How did you come up with the idea for you story/stories?
LVP: I won't bother with my first story or its sequel because I never liked them that much and have since pulled them... But for Son of a Preacher Man, I got the idea from watching Joel Ostein on TV one day. I thought of this like really corrupt, creepy, overly plastic/handsome televangelist and at first I wanted it to be Carlisle...but the roles of the son/daughter just seemed SO much better suited to Jasper/Rosalie, particularly in the context of the story, so I created Reverend Hale instead...and the idea just blossomed over a few days until I couldn't ignore it anymore.

To Get Back Home came from the song "Golden Slumbers" by the Beatles - but more inspired by the feeling than the lyrics. Sad and sweet...and I just thought it would be nice to show the blossoming of something between two best friends. And of course it was for Love through Lemons (contest hosted by LolaShoes and tby789) so it was formed around the idea of that love being conveyed through a lemon.

Pine Lake came from a dream at first I think... and I just wanted to write about the 70s in a southern state like Georgia and incorporate all kinds of nostalgic things... So I started with those ideas and it just grew from there.

What We've Got was a collab with ElleCC and we used Bon Jovi's "Livin' on a Prayer" as inspiration - it was for the anonymous 80s contest.

The First Breath was supposed to be a collab with Oohlalaaah but she flounced and though she was still committed to doing the collab with me, it was hard to mesh our schedules. So I kind of fired her, and since Elle and I had been discussing the story from the start (I had a rough version of the first 5 chapters written before she officially joined in) and since I knew JAustenlover loved Elle's work too, it made sense for us to work together on that one. The idea kind of came from three songs JA gave me as prompts: The Long and Winding Road by the Beatles, Possession by Sarah Maclaughlin, and Slow Dancing in a Burning Room by John Mayer. We just kind of got inspired to write a certain mood from those, and the ideas came from there.

I can’t remember if I have any other stories - hehe - that seems like enough blabbing about stories for now, anyway...

MW: Alrighty then. Oh, let’s make a salad for that barbeque. I think those boys are getting in the pool.
LVP: Salad? I guess, but wow that sounds awfully healthy. Let’s go with potato salad at least? I’ll grab the mayo.

MW: Hmmm, this will be yummy. You like pickles and celery, right?
LVP: They are my favorite items on a relish tray…

MW: Perfect! What self respecting girl doesn’t like pickles? Really. So what’s your favorite board game?
LVP: I like 80s girl games like: Girl Talk, Mall Madness, Dream Phone (or Dream Date or whatever it was called), etc. Classic games? Clue and Trivial Pursuit. (Notice I can never just pick on thing...)

MW: Interesting…I like Clue too. *hee-hee* Now, who is your favorite character to write?
LVP: Jasper, Jasper, Jasper. I like writing his friends, too. My favorite stuff to write in SoaPM was Jasper with all his homies. I like a good Peter or James or someone like that.

MW: Do you ever use any people from real life in your stories? I mean, maybe we can wrangle us up a new Jasper next door.
LVP: Nope. I mean my experiences probably shape some pieces of some of the characters but not outwardly. Although, I did use Sheriff Joe Arpaio in SoaPM!

MW: Oh yes, I’m a fan of Sheriff Joe. His guys are always pitching tents. Oh hey, do you like to camp?
LVP: No...I'm really not good at 'roughing it'. I mean I like the idea of bonfires and beers and smores and stuff.... but I also need a proper bathroom, shower, and bed. So maybe I'd be better at RVing or something.

MW: I’m with you, sweet cheeks! No need to rough it when there are hotels available. But smores? Really? Ewww, that’s just wrong. So sticky and gooey and sweet… Well, maybe I’ll rethink my stand on that. Speaking of sweetness, how does it make you feel when people gush over you and your stories?
LVP: Sometimes it's really nice - especially when it's a sincere compliment about the writing. The fandom is really into hype though - like bandwagons and the next big thing and all that - so I really try not to buy into it too much, or take it all too seriously. I've recognized that more people care about SoaPM Jasper than about me or any of my other stories. :)

MW: Oh, that’s just wrong. Who wouldn’t care about you? You give me names, I’ll take care of it. Hey, do you have a Twilight shirt?
LVP: God no. No one in the RL knows of my addiction. Even if they did - it does not extend as far as actually wanting any merchandise. I barely even like the movies... or the real books anymore for that matter.

MW: *grabs a sweater to cover her “I Love Edward” tank top, even though it’s 95 degrees outside* If you could give one piece of advice to a new author, what would it be?
LVP: Get a beta, have your WHOLE story planned in detail before you post, and ideally have a lot written before you even begin posting, if not all. Pay a lot of attention to characterization and keep it consistent for the love of God. Oh wait, that was more than one...
My beta Alison (Legna989) just answered the plea I left on the first chapter A/N of SoaPM. I didn't have my previous stories betad because I just thought "Oh it's only fanfic, why waste the time..." but I learned that it's important to care about your work and to post your best stuff, so that's when I asked for a beta. I got lucky, she's awesome and truly knowledgeable about grammar and writing style and she's made SoaPM and everything I've written since infinitely more fit for public consumption. She also lived in AZ, and she's a lawyer so she's helped me so much with a lot of the content in SoaPM in terms of making sure it's all accurate.
Everyone should have a beta and there are a lot of people out there who SHOULDN'T be betas... so it's important to be selective.

MW: True dat! Oh yeah, which Disney Princess most closely resembles you?
LVP: I love Jasmine, I'd like to say her, but she might be too dark. So maybe Belle. I WISH I could say Ariel, but nope. Not unless I dye my hair red, get blue contacts, and a purple shell bra!

MW: Hmmm, shell bras... Haven’t worn one of those since college. Well, I mean, when I went to the college last month to look at the pretty 21 year olds. Anyway, which Twilight saga book is your favorite? And what’s your opinion on Breaking Dawn?
LVP: I liked Eclipse because it was very Jasper-y - but overall I think Twilight was the best one. It kind of just kept going downhill from there. New Moon bored me to tears. Breaking Dawn was entertaining, but also ridiculous and I can't believe they let her publish it.

MW: Do you check out any of those FanFic blogs? *cough* like the one here *cough*
LVP: Well... sometimes people rec my stories in some of them *cough* like the one here *cough* and send me links so I try to check them out and comment when they do. But the only blog I visit with any sort of regularity is TLYDF. I really try not to get caught up too much in the sites and being on twitter constantly and all that.... I do have RL to attend to and I like not really being involved in any of the drama that frequently arises.

MW: Oh drama. Speaking of which, I think someone just got thrown in the pool over there. We need to get a move on, check those potatoes. What is your favorite part about fan fic and the Twilight fandom?
LVP: Learning from other great writers, getting feedback on my own stuff, getting to talk to fun people, and catching glimpses of so many people's incredible imaginations.

MW: And if you could be on any reality tv show, what would it be?
LVP: Jersey Shore. I want to tan and work on my hair bump all day.

MW: *glances out the window* Oh look, the blonde surfer boy just took his shirt off. Oh my… Speaking of which, if you could get it on with any character from one of your stories, who would it be?
LVP: Hmm. It'd have to be Jasper from SoaPM, obviously. That or Colonel Whitlock from the First Breath, lol.

MW: Yes, your Jasper was nice. So hot. One of only two Jasper’s in all the fan fic I’ve read that I actually wanted Bella to be with. Hey, do you think your Jasper could wash his own laundry?
LVP: I think SoaPM Jasper could manage, although he'd probably use too much soap and maybe he'd shrink some stuff.

MW: Ohhhh, no! I don’t like skrinkage! *sticks fingers in ears* La-la-la-la-la!!!!
LVP: *shakes her head* Oh, sweet Jesus. Hey, in my apartment I probably have over 30 purses, and there more stored at my parents house. I have a handbag fetish.

MW: Did you say fetish? Hmmm, lovely. What 3 things can you not leave the house without?
LVP: Blackberry, wallet, i-pod. I guess I'd realistically need my house keys the most, but not if I have to forsake one of those other things.

MW: And, more importantly, who is your celebrity crush?
LVP: Hmmm... I don't think I'll ever stop loving Johnny Depp.

MW: Oh Johnny…he’s yummy.
LVP: Like cheesecake yummy.

MW: Oh yeah. Hey, what’s your favorite almost curse word?
LVP: I use ‘damn’ and ‘hell’ a lot., and when I remember I like to say ‘balls’ or ‘bollocks’. Makes me laugh.

MW: And if Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
LVP: I forgive you.

MW: Ohhhhh… So you ready to crash a barbeque? *glances in the mirror to check out her new “Edward Cullen Owns My Ass” bikini*
LVP: Sure! *poses in the mirror while checking out her new “J.Whitlock Private Parking” bikini*

MW: I’m glad I remembered to have you bring a swimsuit. edwardsbloodtype didn’t get so lucky. Good thing my hot tub is warm…and private. Hmmmm, that girl… How many days a week do you get full on made up? Make up, hair, jewelry, perfume, everything!
LVP: Pretty much every day. I don't wear a ton of make up, but always at least mascara and a bit of eye shadow and powder. Always have some kind of perfume (not heavy though, usually just body splash or Abercrombie perfume) and I'm big into accessories so I always have about 37 bracelets and necklaces on.

MW: Abercrombie… I think a few of those boys next door could work there.
LVP: Oh nice, I love me some fresh young abs, I mean, faces.

MW: Oh heck yes woman! Abs… Wonder if any of those boys could do our laundry on their washboard abs? Oh hey, one more thing before we go, how did you choose your username?
LVP: Well, I was thinking of some kind of play on ‘pastiche’, which basically means when someone imitates a renowned artist’s work, intentionally mimicking their style, generally in homage… seemed fitting. I threw in the LaVie just to stick with the French, and there you go. Later on I discovered PastichePen, and so then we began to refer to each other as “The Other Pastiche”. Hehehe.

MW: Sweet. My boobs look okay in this top? I don’t want them falling out…yet. Let’s go find us some men!
LVP: Your boobs look fab. Nothing wrong with them falling out just a little. *winks as she checks out her ass in the mirror one more time before flinging the back door open* Oh boys! Lookie what we got! It’s your lucky day!


*******


Mrs. White: Sorry the potato salad was all gone, Bee.
beegurl13: That's okay, this chicken is good.
MW: Yeah, you should have seen their barbeque grill, it was great, though I'm getting bored with neighbor guy.
bg13: What, did he find a girlfriend? *snickers*
MW: *glares* Oh no, honey, he was perfectly happy with both me and my potato salad.
bg13: Wait, I thought LVP helped you make that.
MW: She did, but then her and that blond surfer boy disappeared...I thought I heard her yelling "Park it here, Mr. Whitlock." Must have been mistaken.
bg13: Okaaayyy. Sounds like a good time.
MW: Oh you know it! It's never a party until I show up!

Mrs. White gets some Extreme High Anxiety with edwardsbloodtype

So, Mrs. White is at it again. She got wordy with one of my favorite authors and then offered to buy me lingerie and let me have a few extra hours with her Robporn collection if I'd post this extended piece of awesomeness for her.

Of course I said yes. I'm no fool. Besides, you don't turn down free lingerie. Ever.

And I'm not even mentioning the Robporn. Seriously, it's the biggest collection I've ever seen. And it's beautiful.

So, without further ado, may I present to you --

Mrs. White's Exteme Interview with one of my favorites...

edwardsbloodtype

Enjoy!!

Mrs. White – Hey edwardsbloodtype, thanks for coming over today to ogle the neighbor guy with me. I do love it when he trims those hedges.
edwardsbloodtype – *peers outside* He’s pretty hot. My neighbor is bald and fat and makes his wife mow the lawn. I’ve never been on the west coast except for a layover to Hawaii, so it’s nice to be here. Layover’s don’t count though.
MW – No, that doesn’t count. Hey, who were you on the phone with?
EBT – Suzy, my beta.
MW - Speaking of Suzy, she told me to ask you when she’s getting her raise and vacation time because dealing with all that’s gone down in recent chapters has her considering a career change.
EBT - I’m just gonna snort and tell Suzy how cute she is. No, but seriously, the story wouldn’t be half as good if it weren’t for her additions, outtakes and the availability of her to talk to me every single day. She is awesome in so many ways, and I am lucky to have her.

MW – Hmmm, you two are so cozy together…it’s kinda hot. So, how did you get started in fan fic?
EBT – Yeah, uh I don’t swing that way…well, unless there’s tequila involved. After the ultimate disappointment when BD ended, I went online, having heard there was more, (SM’s outtakes and whatnot). I had read a story that took up where Stephenie Meyer faded to black in the BD honeymoon scenes, in which I can’t recall the name. From there I found a couple of fics that were alternate universes but still vampire centric. And then I discovered All Human stories and it opened up a whole new world. At first I didn’t get it. I was like, “What’s the point…the key element is the vampires…” But then, I got it and I haven’t stopped. I think The Arrangement by manyafandom was the first AH and wow, is that a great place to start...talk about jumping right in!
As far as writing, I had this idea in my head for a simple reunion between Bella and Edward a few years after he leaves her, and I was scared to post. But it was a great experience, because not only did enough people read it to give me the confidence to be more courageous with my story ideas, but they were so supportive and encouraging AND I met my beta Suzy through that, which I honestly have to say, is the best thing I have gotten out of my whole Twilight obsession. She is my bestie and I love her and she makes my stories complete.

MW – *makes note to self to stock up on tequila* Oh, that’s kinda special. So I thought I’d make us a little treat. What’s your favorite item on a relish tray?
EBT - Pickles…hee hee.
MW – Hmmmm, yum. And your favorite desert?
EBT - Anything chocolate, could be chocolate covered poo, don’t care.

MW – Well, maybe these chocolate covered pickles aren’t too bad an idea then. So, what are your favorite fic’s?
EBT - I have many, for different reasons. Clipped Wings and Inked Armor is written in such a way that it feels effortless and genuine and her characters, though I don’t think any of us can truly relate to them, have a darkness and passion that we can empathize with. Tropic of Virgo by In A Blue Bathrobe, is sheer beauty to me, and I loved her characters ability to speak and connect through poetry. The Lost Boys by Hwimsey was the most original fic I have ever read. Her writing is almost old fashioned and lyrical. That story was so well done. Emancipation Proclamation is another that I feel is original, unpredictable and very well written. How To Save A Life by Unholy Obsession, is very real, and written in a way that is seamless and engaging. I could go on for days.

MW – Nice. Do you have anything pierced?
EBT - Just my ears. If my boobs were still in the same place they were ten years ago I would get my nipples done. Now the rings would just weigh them down further and lord knows we don’t need that.

MW – I hear that, though I have some nice corsets that keep mine in place. When’s the last time you bought lingerie?
EBT- *snorts* 2001.

MW – Okay, so we’re going shopping after this. I just got my alimony check for the month; we can give neighbor guy a little show when we get back. How did you come up with the ideas for you stories?
EBT – *looks out the window at said neighbor guy, hence becoming totally distracted* Oh, um… what was the question? Right, so I’ll Be Your Lover Too was just a way for me to see if I could write smut, and the story line sort of evolved chapter by chapter without a set plan. With High Anxiety, I had come across an article about a corrupt judge and then the idea of a restraining order kind of came into play then because I wanted to see if I could hold the audience’s attention without having any (or little) smut in the story. I must say I am thoroughly impressed at how long the readers have held out. It also makes for tremendous pressure to have B& E’s first time nothing other than stellar.

MW - If you could get it on with any character from one of your stories, who would it be and why?
EBT - Oh definitely HA Edward, simply because even though he’s inexperienced, he’s craving the affection and with his OCD, you know he’s gonna want to do it repeatedly until he gets it perfect.

MW – Oh goodness, is it getting hot in here? *fans self* No? Okay, um how does it make you feel when people gush over you and your stories?
EBT - Without sounding like a total jerk, I hate it and love it at the same item. It embarrasses me and I am uncomfortable being in the spotlight, but by the same token, it is thrilling and really kind of cool to have people waiting on my next word. I secretly enjoy the power. *rubs hands together and laughs maniacally*
However, because this is relatively anonymous, not having to show my face and being able to sit here and do this at six am in my husband’s bathrobe, it makes it tons of fun. The thing is, I am not an egotistical person. In the fandom there is a distinct hierarchy between the readers and the authors and then again amongst those specific groups. I group myself in with the readers- I am just here to enjoy an escape from the mundane, doing what I enjoy doing. It is an absolute honor to hear that someone liked my story, as well as having them share their own experiences with me. I get a kick out of someone who tells me they heard a song that reminded them of HA or that a chapter stuck with them for days.

MW – Hmmm, interesting. So do you listen to music while you write?
EBT – I need quiet when I write. I am always in the car, so the music I listen to definitely inspires me. I keep a notebook in the car as well, to jot down ideas and songs that I hear.

MW - How did you choose your pen name?
EBT - It was one of the few clever Twilight related things I could come up with that wasn’t taken, but in hindsight I wish I would have used something non Twilight related.

MW – Well, let’s see…quick, what’s your favorite fruit and soda?
EBT – Kiwi, and I don’t drink soda, but I guess root beer is good.

MW – Kiwi Rootbeer… No? Yeah, not nearly sexy enough. So, who is your favorite character to write?
EBT - Oddly enough, Edward. I would think channeling a sixteen year old boy would be the farthest thing from my capabilities since I haven’t been that age for some time now, and I am definitely not a male, nor do I understand (or like at the moment) the species as a whole. But I think he flows better and more readily for me than Bella does. I guess because Edward is what I had wanted in a boy at that age? I like to curse, so maybe that’s why, I have no idea.

MW – I think it’s illegal to “channel” sixteen year old boys. Well, I know it is in this state. Don’t ask how I know. Hey, have you ever been to China?
EBT – Um, no. That was random. And I’m in New York. There aren’t a lot of laws here regarding, uh…”channeling.”

MW – *winks* Yeah, I know. Which Twilight saga book is your favorite? And what’s your opinion on Breaking Dawn?
EBT - I think Twilight has to be my fave. It’s where it all started. It’s where they fell in love and that to me is the best part, because I am a romantic. BD was disappointing. I feel as though because Bella got everything she wanted and then some, it ended too fairy tale like. No one was suffering. It frustrated me, because she didn’t have to make any sacrifices as everyone else did. I also would have liked to have seen some more bloodshed between the Vamp showdown which I thought was anticlimactic and boring considering all the buildup. I mean…all that and Bella’s powers turn out to be a stupid shield. She should have been able to shoot silver bullets from her nipples or something cool like that.
Oh, and don’t get me started over the cut out sex scenes and her begging her own newly devirginized husband to do it on their honeymoon. You know if that were real, Edward would have been tapping that shit like crazy, no whining.

MW – Hmmm, honeymoon scenes… What color are your sheets?
EBT - Sage green with Sharpie marker designs all over them.

MW – Nice. If you could give one piece of advice to a new author, what would it be?
EBT - One? Pssssh. Get a beta that is good at grammar and punctuation. You can have a great story, but if the mechanics of it are poor, no one is going to read it. Also…do your research. The internet is a wealth of information, and the story will be so much better if your facts are straight. Lastly, write what you want to write. Be brave, take chances, go out on a limb, and don’t be intimidated by threats to flounce.

MW – K, rapid fire time. Ready?
EBT - Is it sad that I want to go to Forks? I mean really want to go to Forks, like I would love to get a mass fan fiction trip going. That would be awesome! They should rent out Jake’s house to tourists.
MW - That would be cool!
EBT – I have no excuse at all, I just wanna go. It looks really pretty there. I have a reader from there who says it’s like Podunk.
MW – What, no malls?
EBT – No, very folksy.

MW – Huh, probably hard to find a good g-string. Okay, if you could be on any reality TV show, what would it be?
EBT - Jersey Shore. * snorts*
MW - How many purses do you have?
EBT - Around 15 or so. The good ones I rotate seasonally or by occasion. But I am a shoe girl. I had close to 250 pairs of shoes before my house burned down. Now I have maybe 100.
MW - Do you ever wear headbands?
EBT – LOL! I am not allowed. I have pictures of me in high school that I have a color coordinated one on in every single picture. I also have giant late eighties hair. In the pictures...not now. The perm should totally make a comeback.
MW - What’s the last magazine you read?
EBT - Details.
MW - Which Disney Princess most closely resembles you and why?
EBT - Oh God, probably Cinderella before she meets the fairy Godmother. I am all sweet and girly on the inside but feel like a dirty slave on the outside.

MW – Unggggg…Details photo spread and dirty slaves… Hmmm, okay, enough of that. Hey look, neighbor guy is trimming the hedges along my fence. I may need to find a way to repay him for that.
EBT – Buttsecks?
MW – Maybe… I just wanna play with him for awhile and then come home by myself.
EBT - ME TOO. That’s how life should be - fuck me and leave me alone. And you can print that. Oh, and the guy should pay for stuff and take out the garbage.
MW – Do you buy trash bags with a draw string or with the tie flaps?
EBT – Oh, draw string for sure.

MW – Right on Sista’ Couga’ Friend! What is your favorite ALMOST curse word?
EBT - Peen. I would work it into every conversation if it weren’t so inappropriate.
MW – Speaking of peen, did you see Dear John?
EBT – Not yet. I have the book, but have yet to open it. Last movie I saw in a theater was New Moon.
MW - Holy Hannah, Channing Tatum is HOT in a uniform. Oh goodness...
EBT – I KNOW!!!!!! Even with a broken peen. :D

MW – Speaking of totally hot guys, if Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
EBT - “Wow, you are much thinner here in Heaven that you were on earth. You’ve been a good, kind person during your time there, so here’s the keys to your waterfront mansion and 24 hour access to Chocolate Twizzlers, and porn. Oh, and once Rob meets his demise, I’ll direct him straight to your playroom.”

MW - Ahhh, Rob in a playroom… That would be Heaven. So how about some reader questions?
EBT – Yeah, get on that.
MW – Ohh, here’s a good one. AnotherJenny from Twilighted asked - Is Charlotte going to play a roll in this eff'ed up situation turning around, or is it going to come from some other angle?
EBT – The answer to that will be revealed in chapter thir…wait is that your Robporn collection? It’s huge!

MW – Yes, well I like things… huge. So how about another one. Maplestyle from Twilighted wants to know - How hard was it for you to post your very first fanfic story? Did it make you really nervous or was it something that you were just able to do?
EBT - I was scared shitless when I posted the first chapter of my first story, and shaking with fear and excitement when I read the first review. It is a really big thing to put your work out there, especially when there is so much outstanding writing in the fandom to compare it to. It’s hard not to feel inadequate, but if I look at my first story and what I have now, comparatively, the writing has improved substantially, so it’s very cool to see the progression. I still get nervous when I post a chapter. But now it’s because of all the angry PM’s I get. It’s okay, its still cool.
MW - Oh, I don't know if my friend ever told you this in a review (she's not great at leaving them *ehem, you know who you are*) but that scene you had of him pitching, with Carlisle and Emmett watching, she said for her it was one of the best FF scenes she's ever read.
EBT – Aww, that’s awesome. Funny cause I didn’t write that, Suzy did!
MW – Really? She loved it. Well, she said something along the lines of it being one of the most honest and just beautiful scenes she's read.
EBT - I have no experience with sports, so I asked her to take the reins and then I added my style to it, but that was all her.
MW - Cool, she did good. It was a good scene, I liked it.
EBT - Me too, I was thrilled with it.
MW - I think my friend was crying, and she doesn't cry often at fic’s.
EBT – Awwwww, that’s so nice. I cried too.

MW – Oh look, neighbor guy is right outside the window. I’m sure he knows we’re in here, wants to see what we’re wearing. We need to get over to that lingerie store so we can show him a few things.
EBT - I can’t wait! I need some smut!
MW - I'm so excited for it now... Ohhhh... Yeah, there has to be smut.
EBT – Good things to come…

MW – Hey, speaking of things to come… *giggles* So you working on anything new?
EBT – Yup, wanna know?
MW - Yes!!!
EBT – Well, Edward and Rosalie are…
MW - *glances outside* What the…
EBT – Don’t roll your eyes!
MW – No, look. Neighbor guy is holding something up in the window, I think it’s recording our conversation. He’s trying to sneak High Anxiety spoilers!
EBT – WHAT??
MW - *Jumps up and runs to the window, reaching out and grabbing neighbor guy by the glorious, thick dark brown hair that’s poking up in all directions* What are you doing?
NG – They made me do it! All those hotties over at Twilighted, they bribed me with scantily clad pictures of themselves and cupcakes if I’d get them some information on that story you’re talking about. I just really love cupcakes. And vanilla frosting…
MW – Oh really? Frosting huh?
EBT – *Approaches window after adjusting her cleavage* Hmmm, you and your vanilla need some hot sauce, my friend.
MW - *Exchanges looks with EBT* Oh, well I think we can handle that. Meet us in my hot tub, boy, ten minutes, and bring tequila. You got that?
NG - *Looks back and forth between MW and EBT* Oh hell yeah!
MW – Yeah, I think it’s time to finish this interview. Things are about to get very M rated up in here.
EBT - *watches as neighbor guy runs off toward his house* I didn't bring my swimming suit.
MW - *quirks eyebrow* I wasn't planning on wearing one.
EBT – Awesome…

*beegurl13 sits looking through pictures on Mrs. White's digital camera*

Mrs. White - Hey Bee, here's those garters and undies I promised. I'll bring bras next time...

*she drops the overflowing shopping bags on the floor*

Mrs. White - What are you looking at?

beegurl13 - Um, nothing. *shoves the camera into the sofa*

Mrs. White - *smirking* Honey, your eyes are too innocent for that. Trust me, hot tubs are not for you. And neither is tequila.

beegurl13 - Yes, ma'am.

Mrs. White - Hmmm, so easily persuaded. I like you.

beegurl13 - *looks around nervously* Um, people know I'm here, they'll know to look for me if I don't come home.

Mrs. White - Ahhh yes, true. Well, take the black and red ones. *nudging a bag towards beegurl13* We'll have ourselves a little fashion show next time.

beegurl13 - Um, okay. *reaches out to grab the bag as she runs for the door*

Mrs. White - Oh, I do love the young ones. Hmm, reminds me, wonder what Neighbor Guy is up to...